| Saturday, February 18, 2006 |
| I have a date tomorrow... |
I feel like a young chica...stupid, immature and indecisive. Why has it taken me so long to accept this date, this invite for lunch and drinks? This has been a mind boggling-emotional decision to make....but thanks to the wonderful advice of my sis, Nan and Keener, I've accepted the invitation to go out with LexLu.
I have been chatting/talking/texting LexLu for a little over 3 weeks now. We were supposed to meet up last Saturday for drinks, but I chickened out at the last minute and told him I had a prior engagement that had totally slipped my mind. I know I'm an ass. Don't send me *hate mail* I just need time, time to get back into the scene of actually going out and doing something for me.
LexLu is an engineer; he's smart, articulate, attractive [according to the pics he sent me], lives no more than 40 min away, owns his house, financially secure...and he's got jokes. Any man that can make this chica laugh has at least a foot in the door. There’s chemistry there…which is a  positive. We're meeting at the Hard Rock Hotel & Casino in Ft. Lauderdale. It's an open, public place ... I KNOW I will be ok...my women's intuition tells me that I will...then why am I scared, why am I so nervous?
Does my past haunt me? Do images of Kevin's creeping around still trouble me? Do the millions of lies I uncovered about him still playback in the back of my mind? Can I ever -- will I ever be able to trust a man again? I giess I will never know unless I start dating and give someone the opportunity of getting close to me. I need to let my guard down just a tad…and let someone into my life. In the very least, I can have a buddy to go to the movies with, have a beer, salsa dancing…who knows? |
posted by MsApples @ 9:36:00 AM  |
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| About Me |
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Name: MsApples
Home: Miami, Florida, United States
About Me: 46 year old NYC Cuban Love Goddess, now residing in MIA, divorced, mom to 2 teenagers, overworked & underpaid educator to loving, yet outta control students...I am intelligent, creative, sexy, compassionate, funny, sarcastic, loving, fucked up, romantic, spontaneous, moody at times, confused, confusing, a bit geeky, helpful and helpless at times, a good listener and a good friend.
See my complete profile
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