The Apple Orchard: i am spent...

The Apple Orchard

musings, chronicles, commentaries, bitchins & ramblins of a lost, but lovin 40 somethin year old soul...come take a bite

Monday, January 28, 2008

i am spent...

I received a phone call from Andre's English teacher early this morning. It seems that he had to have Andre escorted out of the classroom for inappropriate conduct and was possibly looking at indoor suspension. SIGH I immediately asked him what happened to let it get this blown outta proportion.

SIDEBAR: I know who I gave birth to, my Andre is the soft-spoken one, he doesn't usually become Jekyll and Hyde at a moments notice; I am also NOT a parent that will cover up and sugar coat her children's act....BUT something had to get him to that point.

I asked permission to leave school...my principal was kind enough to get coverage for me and I headed out to the high school.

I arrived at the school, told them who I was meeting with and why, and one of the assistants in the office asked me to take a seat. In a matter of minutes, I was escorted to the teacher's classroom/office where he tended to my questions and needs.

On the way to school, Andre had called me and filled me in on the happenings. The teacher had apparently embarrassed him in-front of his peers by mentioning his grade on a particular test that was taken on Friday. Andre says that he asked the teacher if they could discuss it after class, and that the teacher said that he could say what he wanted, whenever he wanted and he had to deal with it. Andre LOST it. He told me "mama, that man got to me and I just had to tell him to shut the fuck up"! *SMH* I told Andre that he has better self-control and that he crossed the line in cursing the teaching out. That was disrespectful. I even asked him, "Andre, how would you feel if someone did that to your mama"? Andre's response, "no one would do EVER do that to you, cuz your a great teacher and you don't plays those games, mama".

Well, I walk into the classroom, the teacher escorts me into his side office. The students are all working quietly. I sit down and tell him that I am sorry to meet with him under these circumstances....but I needed to know what happened, so that something like this won't repeat itself.

As of yet, I HAVE NOT identified myself as a teacher...I like to keep that under wraps for certain reasons....he begins to tell me that Andre is a good kid that has lots of potential, but yet can be a lil lazy when it comes to his study habits. "Andre is smart, just doesn't know how smart he is...I try to bring that out in ALL of my students. I take full responsibility for what I teach and how I get it done". "I used Andre as an example for the rest of the class on how lack of motivation will get you to fail in life."

WHAT?

SCREEEEECH...HIT THE BRAKES....SAY THAT AGAIN???

Otay...I guess that this was the time to enlighten him and tell him that I was a 23 year veteran teacher. Well, the man's face literally CONTORTED [I made it up...shhhhh]. He immediately changed his tone with me, and his body language became very guarded. I questioned his classroom management...I questioned his WAYS of reaching out to the kids...the man became dumbfounded. I began to talk...he would talk over me and interrupt me, would not let me get a word in edgewise. At one point, I even told him...."ok, I will be quiet, so you can hear yourself talk, because you are not listening to me."

There are two sides to EVERY story, and I was leaning closer to my son's version. I was clearly becoming frustrated with this gentleman, and he was sensing it. I asked him for his undivided attention and if he would just be quiet till I finished and just listen.

I told him that he pushed the envelope with Andre. His statement was out of line, hurtful and totally unprofessional of him [then people wonder why teachers are treated as professionals]. Andre is 15...in one of many his blubbered statements he said Andre was a man and that he would treat him like one....I repeated Andre is 15, a hormonal, testosterone adolescent...not a man as of yet. I told him..."Mr. Miranda, sadly, you hurt his feelings and he lashed out at you, in the only way a 15 year old boy knows how".

It was then and there that something happened...I saw a light bulb flash. The man got it...the man realized what he had said and done was wrong. I smiled. I asked him how long he had been teaching...he's only been in the classroom for three years. He's still has a lot of learning to do...but that's okay...life is a learning process.

Well, to make a looooong ass story short, Mr. Miranda apologized to Andre; Andre apologized to Mr. Miranda, and the piece of resistance...Andre didn't get suspended. Everyone left happy and I realized that talking it through civilly dissolved the environment of aggression, defensiveness and the fear of losing...

SIGH

You know my people, God has a sense of humor, oh YES He does...I was the mediator today. I learned a lesson that will carry me through to tomorrow and the rest of my life. I am going to take my advice and listen to what I say and if I have to, change the way I say it.

Say a prayer for your chica tonight...I truly want all of these legal proceedings to be over and done with...ENOUGH IS ENOUGH already.

I am going to get to bed early tonight...I need at least 9 hours of rest! LOL LOL

Hey, if you got this far...THANKS, a chica needed to vent

BESOS

posted by MsApples @ 1:51:00 PM

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